Complete Guide

How to Write an Obituary: A Complete Guide

Learn how to write a meaningful obituary step by step. Includes examples for mother, father, grandmother, and more.

Published: January 27, 202615 min read

What Is an Obituary?

An obituary is a published notice of a person's death, typically including a brief biography and information about funeral services. More than just an announcement, a well-written obituary celebrates a life, honors cherished memories, and provides comfort to those who are grieving.

Whether you're writing for a newspaper, funeral home website, or online memorial, this guide will help you create a meaningful tribute that captures the essence of your loved one.

How to Write an Obituary: Step-by-Step Guide

Step 1: Gather Essential Information

Start by collecting the basic facts: full name (including maiden name), age, date and place of birth, date and place of death. You'll also want to gather information about education, career, military service, and community involvement.

Step 2: Write the Opening Announcement

The first sentence should announce the death clearly and respectfully. Here are common approaches:

"[Name], [age], passed away peacefully on [date] in [location]."

"With heavy hearts, we announce the passing of [Name], [age], of [city], on [date]."

Step 3: Share the Life Story

This is the heart of the obituary. Share key biographical details in chronological or thematic order. Include birthplace, parents, education, career highlights, marriage, children, and significant achievements. Most importantly, capture their personality—what made them unique and loved.

Step 4: List Surviving Family Members

List the immediate family members who survive the deceased. Include spouse, children (and their spouses), grandchildren, siblings, and other significant relatives. Use phrases like "survived by" or "leaves behind."

Step 5: Include Service Information

Provide details about the funeral or memorial service: date, time, location, and any special requests (such as dress code or donations in lieu of flowers). If the service is private, simply note that.

Obituary Examples by Relationship

Obituary Example for Mother

Mary Jane Smith, 72, passed away peacefully on January 15, 2025, surrounded by her loving family. Born in Chicago in 1953, Mary was the heart of the Smith family for over fifty years. She taught elementary school for 35 years while raising three children, touching countless young lives along the way. Mary had an infectious laugh and a gift for making everyone feel welcome. Her Sunday dinners were legendary—generations of family and friends gathered around her table. She found joy in simple pleasures: tending her rose garden, baking cookies with her grandchildren, and sharing stories from her own childhood. She is survived by her husband of 50 years, Robert; children Michael (Sarah), Jennifer (David), and Thomas; eight grandchildren; and her sister Margaret. She was predeceased by her parents and brother. A celebration of Mary's life will be held on Saturday, January 20 at Grace Lutheran Church. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the American Cancer Society in honor of Mary's years of volunteer service.

Obituary Example for Father

Robert James Thompson, 78, of Denver, Colorado, passed away on February 8, 2025. A Vietnam veteran, Bob built a distinguished 40-year career in civil engineering, helping design bridges and highways across the Rocky Mountain region. He was known for his meticulous attention to detail and his mentorship of young engineers. Bob was a man of few words but endless generosity. He coached Little League for 20 years, never missing a game. His workshop was his sanctuary, where he crafted furniture for family and friends. Each piece bore his signature: a small heart carved into the bottom. He is survived by his wife of 52 years, Eleanor; son James (Michelle); daughter Susan (Mark); six grandchildren; and his brother William. A military graveside service will be held at Fort Logan National Cemetery. The family suggests memorial donations to the Wounded Warrior Project.

Obituary Example for Grandmother

Eleanor Rose Wilson, 89, passed away peacefully in her sleep on March 1, 2025. Known to all as Grandma Ellie, she lived a life defined by love and faith. Born in 1936, she witnessed remarkable changes in the world but held fast to her values: family first, kindness always. She raised five children through difficult times, always finding ways to stretch a meal to welcome an unexpected guest. Her kitchen was the heart of the home, filled with the aroma of fresh bread and the sound of her humming hymns. In her later years, she became a second mother to 12 grandchildren and 18 great-grandchildren. She attended every birthday, every graduation, every milestone. Her arms were always open, her stories endlessly engaging. She is survived by her children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and countless others whose lives she touched. A private memorial service will be held. In lieu of flowers, please perform an act of kindness in Ellie's name.

Common Mistakes to Avoid When Writing an Obituary

  • 1.1. Focusing too much on death An obituary should celebrate life, not dwell on the circumstances of death. Focus on how they lived.
  • 2.2. Leaving out personality Include stories, quirks, and character traits that made your loved one unique.
  • 3.3. Getting facts wrong Double-check names, dates, and relationships. Errors can hurt surviving family members.
  • 4.4. Omitting important people Work with family members to ensure all significant relationships are acknowledged.

Frequently Asked Questions About Writing Obituaries